Jose Kurien ...................................................
Have you ever taken the time to ponder over the eternal mysteries that abound the world, which enfold and envelop the whole of creation?
Dear parents, we are the glory and the crown of God's creation. In us and through us shall God continue to work wonders in this world. Our children are the MIRACLES God performs everyday and every moment in our lives. He continues to love, bless and protect us through them. Our children are His Divine Love made manifest in us.
From a very close distance we watched our children being born. We could feel their power like a divine mystery on earth, like an object of worship… a spiritual embryo… sacred gifts given to us, into our hands from heaven, lovingly… most affectionately.
In order to respond to this sacred mission - divine guardianship - we must direct our heart and soul, our wisest and most perfect care; surrender and submit our ignorance contaminated by egoism and apathy, authority and arrogance; sacrifice our intellectual pride and self-proclaimed rights, our self-centeredness and impulsiveness.
These reflections here are to be therefore whispered into our deeper consciousness, into our souls with truer, more earnest and most authentic search that we may truly become God's instruments to bring hope, happiness and peace into the lives of our children, in this world of ours.
Do we agree that the most important role we play in our busy life is that of a parent?
Do we examine our parental roles daily?
How often have we told our children about the many beautiful and wonderful things in this world?
Have we ever told ourselves that it is not important what our children may do or become in life, but that they must feel successful and significant as persons, which is most important?
Do we know that though we spend almost 95% of our energy, time and money on our children's cognitive development, it is the emotions that take precedence in virtually all of life's important situations?
Do we know the fact that many children ruin their lives because of parental ignorance, parental negligence and selfishness?
How often do we get to see our children laughing aloud or smiles breaking up on theirs lips from within them?
How often must we have emphasized on the future but forgotten to teach our children to take pleasure in life's journey?
What has been our most dominating dream - that of our children rolling in luxury one day, or living happily and peacefully wherever on earth they may be?
If we have already decided and designed our children's future, what do we then expect our children to do now? Where shall they search for their own identity, their own uniqueness?
Are we realistic in our goals for our children?
Are we among those who pursue 'more', that neither we nor our children have time for enjoying the present moments?
Have we ever looked for the causes of so much anger and hostility, anguish and suffering around us… in our world? Do we know that they originate from our very homes?
Where do so many million desperate, frustrated, self-centered and ruthless people come from? Are they not coming from homes like ours? How are we different from them?
Do we think we can teach our children what we ourselves do not know, what we ourselves do not practice?
Have we ever looked at our own errors and shortcomings and vowed to avoid their repetition in our children?
We may know many things. We may be fantastic, fabulous, marvellous people achievers. But do our children feel happy at home, or do they feel suffocated with the knowledge we possess or the achievements we have made?
Have we ever told our children that failure is part of the learning process?
Do we want our children to play every game, master every art and excel in everything they attempt? Do we realize the futility of such dreams?
Do we know that if we disregard our children's true feelings today and impose on them our ideas, thoughts and ways, they will revolt against us one day and call us misnomers, ruthless people, and regard us as their enemies?
Have we alienated our children from their friends by telling them they are bad, uncultured, indecent and dirty? Let's remember that our children need friends and lots of them.
Are our punishments in proportion to the mistakes our children commit or are they much more voluminous and petrifying?
Do we take out our anger on our children when we have a row with someone somewhere, and then justify it as something natural?
Do we know that though many adults give convincing reasons for their irrational behaviour and the cruelties they commit, the real causes are often the childhood pains they suffered in their early days?
Do we know that children usually suppress all the hurt they receive from parents because of their utter helplessness and not out of love and respect for them?
Have we ever asked ourselves what we want most for your children?
Do we groom our children aiming that one day they would need to maintain a strong spiritual connection to all of humanity and to a higher power?
Do we believe in the pivotal truth that children everywhere are Divine Creations?
All our actions therefore should be of sensitivity, understanding, self-sacrifice and surrender. And let not our lives in search of our children's happiness be like the philosophical blind man looking for a black cat in a dark room which isn't there.
JOSE KURIEN is the Principal of DAV Public School, Nerul, Navi Mumbai.
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