Why did the stoplight turn red?

Walking up to a department store's fabric counter, the pretty girl said, “I would like to buy this material for a new dress. How much does it cost?”
“Only one kiss per yard,” replied the salesman with a smirk. “That’s fine,” said the girl. “I’ll take ten yards.”
With expectation and anticipation written all over his face, the salesman quickly measured out the cloth, wrapped it up, and teasingly held it out.
The girl picked up the package, pointed to the old man standing beside her, and smiled, “Grandpa will pay the bill.”

The boss was very exasperated with his new secretary. She ignored the telephone when it rang.
“You must answer the telephone,” he told her irritably.
“All right,” she replied, “but it seems so silly. Nine times out of ten, it's for you!”

“Doctor, doctor, I think I’m a dustbin.”
“Don’t talk rubbish!”

EVER WONDER...
Why the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our skin?
Why “abbreviated” is such a long word?
Why doctors call what they do “practice”?
Why they don't make the whole plane out of the material used for the indestructible black box?
Why sheep don’t shrink when it rains?
Why they are called apartments when they are all stuck together?

A foreman had ten very lazy men working for him. One day he decided to trick them into doing some work for a change.
“I’ve got a really easy job today for the laziest one among you,” he announced. “Will the laziest man please put his hand up?”
Nine hands went up.
“Why didn’t you put your hand up?” he asked the tenth man. “Too much trouble,” came the reply.

Dad: “Son, what do you want for your 18th birthday?”
Son: “Just a radio, dad... with a sports car around it.”