Three men were discussing coincidences. The first man said, “My wife was reading Tale of Two Cities and she gave birth to twins."

“That's funny,” the second man remarked, “My wife was reading The Three Musketeers and she gave birth to triplets.”

The third man shouted, “Good God, I have to rush home!”

When asked what the problem was, he exclaimed, "When I left the house, my wife was reading Ali Baba and the Forty Thieves!”


What did the cook say to the dough?
“I “NEED” you!”

A young and foolish pilot wanted to sound cool on the aviation frequencies. So, this was his first time approaching a field during the night-time. Instead of making any official requests to the tower, he said: “Guess who?”

The controller switched the field lights off and replied: “Guess where?”

A boy was having a lot of difficulty in French class. To encourage him, his teacher said, “You'll know you're really beginning to get it when you start dreaming in French.”

The boy ran into class all excited one day, saying, “Teacher, teacher! I had a dream last night and everyone was talking in French!”

“Great!” said the teacher; “what were they saying?”

“I don’t know,” the boy replied; “I couldn’t understand them.”

A man had two goldfish; he named one of them “One” and the other “Two”.

He did this because… if one died, he’d still have two.



What’s the difference between a cat and a comma?
A cat has its claws at the end of its paws; a comma is a pause at the end of a clause.