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A little girl asked her mother for ten rupees to give to an old lady in the park.
Her mother was touched by the child's kindness. "There you are, my dear, but, tell me, isn't the lady able to work any more?"
"Oh yes," came the reply. "She sells sweets!"
Father: "Son, when Abraham Lincoln was your age, he walked 12 miles to school."
Son: "Dad, when Abraham Lincoln was your age, he was President."
When a knight in armour was killed in battle, what sign did they put on his grave?
Rust in peace!
Teacher: "You copied from Hari's exam paper, didn't you?
Ravi: "How did you know?"
Teacher: "Hari's paper says 'I don't know' and you have put 'Me, neither'!"
What do you call two spiders who just got married?
Newly-webs!
A man who had just undergone a very complicated operation kept complaining about a bump on his head and a terrible headache. Since his operation had been an intestinal one, there was no reason why he should be complaining of a headache. Finally his nurse, fearing that the man might be suffering from some post-operative shock, spoke to the doctor about it.
The doctor assured the nurse, "Don't worry about a thing. He really does have a bump on his head. About halfway through the operation we ran out of anaesthetic."
